


it's not fratricide (because he's my cousin)

by orphan_account



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: M/M, anyway derek is a horrible horrible person and scott knows this, as in scott likes to hold derek's crush on stiles over his head, based on that au where derek is scott's older brother because reasons, but anyway there is pining, but the same principles still apply, everyone knows this, except in this one he's derek's step-cousin, pining of the derek hale sort where he pines and broods, scott might enjoy this more than a normal person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-07
Updated: 2012-09-07
Packaged: 2017-11-13 18:09:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/506272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Scott's not stupid; he knows that Derek's had a thing for Stiles for years.</p>
            </blockquote>





	it's not fratricide (because he's my cousin)

**Author's Note:**

> I regret nothing.

The thing about Derek Hale is that Scott has pretty much known that Derek’s had a thing for Stiles for years.

Well, obviously not _years_ because Derek first met Stiles when Scott and Stiles were six and Derek was like, nine.

Actually, no.

Scott can probably trace their first meeting back to the age of three, when Scott’s mom married Derek’s uncle and he’s pretty sure that the Stilinskis were invited to the wedding because the Stilinski, the Hale, and the McCall mothers were really close friends. So Derek may have been six years old and totally creeping on like, a three-year-old Stiles who babbled incoherently and liked to put rocks in his mouth just because he was told _no_.

But he’s not really sure on that one, so he just settles for saying that Derek first met Stiles when Scott brought him home for dinner and Derek was totally sucking up to Scott’s mom by helping her bake cookies for Scott’s birthday. Whatever.

Anyway, the main point is that Derek was like, really obvious with his—again, _painfully obvious_ —crush on Scott’s best friend and Scott might not be the sharpest knife in the drawer, but even _he_ knows it.

The thing is that Derek doesn’t know how to show affection and this is a thing that Scott knows very well.

And holy fuck, does Scott know this well.

Derek’s idea of affection is as follows:

The first time they met, Derek decided to show his acceptance of his new step-cousin into the Hale pack by ruffling up his hair and feeding him a cookie.

A cookie in which Scott was allergic to.

Scott, who was all of three years old, totally did not _know_ that he was allergic and all he knew was that the older boy who gave him a cookie was a bad, _bad_ person because Scott couldn’t breathe and they pretty much had to put the reception on hold to rush him home so that his mom could get him his epipen.

When Scott was six, he brought Stiles home and Derek pretty much just whisked Stiles away and force-fed him cookies until Stiles started crying because he was so full but he didn’t want to stop eating the cookies because they were his favorite. Also, Scott actually didn’t get any cookies, so. So much for them being for his birthday.

And then Scott was ten and Derek broke his game console because Scott and Derek should just never be allowed to play together. Ever.

Not to mention the year Scott was eleven and Derek told him there was no such thing as Santa because “it’s not healthy for you to keep on thinking he’s real, Scott.”

A year later, Derek told him the Tooth Fairy didn’t exist.

Scott was thirteen when Derek informed him that the Easter Bunny wasn’t either.

There are more, but these are just the big ones in Scott’s life. In between those big events is, essentially, almost sixteen years worth of Derek hanging at his house, playing his games, eating his chips, eating his ice cream, eating his pizza, stealing attention because Scott’s mom always thinks that Derek doesn’t eat enough, hogging Peter to do manly activities like picking out furniture from IKEA for Scott’s bedroom, and picking on Stiles.

Oh right, so that’s basically how Scott knew that Derek had a thing for Stiles.

No matter how much Derek picked on Scott, he picked on Stiles _more_.

Scott had sixteen years of Derek teasing him, poking fun at him, cackling evilly (probably, though unlikely) as he made plans to make Scott look bad (also not unlikely), and basically Derek was a life ruiner and not in the good way.

But Derek teased Stiles for having a baby face, for being short, for being so into comics (though Derek was a hypocrite because Scott knows _all_ about his Marvel comics that he keeps hidden in the vent by his desk at home), and—until Stiles’s mother died and he started going by Stiles all the time—his name.

Scott knows logically that Derek probably only started finding Stiles physically attractive when Scott and Stiles were like, sixteen. But just because Derek is a dick most of the time, Scott likes to pretend that Derek had a thing for Stiles when they were thirteen just so he can call Derek a pervert in his mind whenever he looks at him.

It’s revenge, really.

It’s not very good revenge, because Derek doesn’t know that revenge is being exacted but it counts. It totally counts.

It’s the funniest thing in the world to make fun of Derek by subtly embarrassing him in front of Stiles by referencing Derek’s crush as often as possible. Granted, Scott doesn’t really do subtlety well, and Stiles keeps on elbowing him in the side like he’s _mad_ when Scott says these things, but it’s funny to see Derek’s face turn that shade of red that fast.

It’s just kind of weird though because Scott will turn to Stiles with a big smile on his face and Stiles is kind of red too, along with his cheeks puffed up like a blowfish and Derek instantly hones in on that (because it really is kind of adorable) and actually _makes_ fun of Stiles like it’s a fucking _defense mechanism or something._

“You’re pathetic, Derek.” Scott hisses at Derek over dinner.

“What the hell, Scott.” Derek says because he is a freak that has clearly never learned how to ask a question.

Peter and Melissa don’t say anything; they just continue to eat dinner because this is actually a very common scene. Never mind that Derek has a family and a family table to gather around and break bread with together. He prefers to keep his Uncle Peter and Aunt Melissa and ickle-bitty Scottikins company every other day for dinner. Scott hasn’t been a fan of this for a long time.

He’s eighteen.

And this has been going on for sixteen years.

Scott McCall is not a happy camper.

“Like, I get it. Stiles is adorable and like a baby kitten, okay, Derek? I get it!” Scott shrugs, reaching for the peas. “It’s just…I’ve been watching you pine for like, two, almost three years, and it’s so sad. Derek, you’re like, twenty-one. Grow a pair and ask him out or I’m going to have to kill you and no one’s really going to miss you.”

“That’s cute.” Derek says dryly.

“Is that the only thing you took away from that?” Scott stares at Derek in horror. “That Stiles is cute?”

“No,” Derek flashes his fangs at Scott, who sticks his tongue out at him in retaliation. (Stupid werewolf with his stupid fangs and eyes and healing and strength and speed and…why can’t Scott be a werewolf again?) “It’s cute because you think you can kill me.”

“You’re not Wolverine, Derek.” Scott snorts, then hides his face to let his laughter reach full heights because Derek is flushing red again because Wolverine is an asshole, but Derek is one too, so it figures that Derek would be Wolverine, in an alternate world. “BEING AN ASS WON’T GET YOU THE GIRL.”

“I don’t want a girl,” Derek points out reasonably. “Unless you’re insinuating that Stiles is a girl, in which case, someday, when I’m dating him, I will tell him about.”

Scott crosses his arms across his chest and glares at Derek. Suddenly a smile plays across his lips and he’s saying in a sing-song voice, “But that’s never going to happen because Stiles has common sense~”

He doesn’t notice the look his mom exchanges with Peter.

-

Scott is heading over to Stiles’s house because Allison is out of town for the weekend and he has nothing better to do so he figures that he and his best friend should take a couple of hours to kick ass on some games they haven’t played recently.

“Yo,” Scott greets, cradling his cell phone between his ear and his shoulder as he fumbles with the games he has and tries to close the car door at the same time. “You up for some quality bro time?”

“Uh, Scott, I thought you were going to visit Allison,” Stiles says, sounding strangely uncomfortable.

“I told you that she’s visiting her mom’s family in New York this weekend.” Scott laughs.

Scott doesn’t have Derek’s super werewolf hearing, so he can’t make out the exact words that Stiles seems to be hissing at someone. He catches words here and there though, like, “… _believe_ you lied…no, she’s _out_ …shut up…liar, lying liar that lies…”

But then Stiles is back and he says to Scott, “Can you come back later?”

“But I’m outside your front door.” Scott says forlornly. Then a sudden realization hits him and, oh. _Oh._ “Are you having sex?”

“No!” Stiles almost yells. He repeats in a slightly calmer voice, “No, no. Scott, I swear I am not having sex right now.”

“But either before I called or after I hang up?” Scott presses because this is so great. Stiles is dating someone, or at least, having sex with them and Derek is going to _flip._ Scott enjoys emotional shitstorms going down when it’s not happening to him, but something about this one just makes him insanely happy. If Stiles is happy, Scott is happy, Derek be damned.

Okay, so maybe Scott feels a little bit bad about that last part, because in his own (stupidly misguided way), Derek was honestly trying to bond with Scott and not just scar him for life.

Stiles opens the door, and obviously, both of them are off the phone now. From the way Stiles is running a hand through his hair and the shaky smile he greets Scott with, it’s clear to see that he’s nervous about something. “Hey Scott.”

“Hey man,” Scott beams and holds up his games, “We haven’t played these in a while and I thought I’d—” He sniffs the air suspiciously. He doesn’t have Derek’s crazy werewolf nose but it took Derek forever to find cologne that wouldn’t send Scott’s senses into overload and give him a panic attack and _he smells it right now._

Stiles looks extremely guilty, mouth drawn down and his eyebrows furrowed with worry, when Scott groans.

“Really, Stiles? _Derek?”_ Scott huffs. Of course Derek would do this. _Of course_ Derek would take all the fun out of Scott baiting him about his relationship problems by _actually getting_ with the person he was pining over.

“I—” Stiles is interrupted when Derek walks into the room wearing only jeans and Scott glares accusingly at him.

“Dude, you seduced my best friend.” Scott is not pouting. Scott is brooding. There is a difference. “Disowned.”

“Actually,” Derek says, smirking, “He came on to me, and when I said no, he gave this little pout and it was pretty much the most disarming thing ever so, really. He seduced me.”

Scott looks at Stiles, horror on his face. “Is this true?”

“…yes?” Stiles says sheepishly, grinning at Scott with a hopeful expression on _his_ face.

“I can’t with you people!” Scott shouts finally, throwing his arms up in a gesture of defeat. “I thought I finally had something over Derek! Finally!”

He looks over at Stiles to see his lower lip jut out in a sassy pout. Holy fuck, Derek was right. This is the most disarming pout in the world. But the difference is, as Scott looks over at Derek, that Derek finds this pout overwhelmingly sexual (as evident in the way that he’s licking his lips as he eyes Stiles) and Scott finds it adorable. Like, he wants to tuck Stiles in a pile of blankets and wrap him in them. That kind of adorable.

“Forgive me.” Stiles says, poking at Scott’s shoulder. “Forgive me.” He pokes him harder, “Please.”

“Oh my gosh, fine.” Scott grumbles, frowning at both of them. “But only because I saw this awkward conversation coming years ago and I get to talk about Allison whenever I want for the next two weeks without complaining.”

“So that means right now.” Stiles blinks.

Scott nods and gestures them to go sit on the couch. “Okay, so Allison told me before she left that she loved me and do you think I should have said something else back? I mean, I said I love her too, because I do, but…”

He can practically feel the misery in the room, both Derek and Stiles’s.

Scott’s happy. Well, Stiles is happy and that makes Scott happy, even if the only reason that Stiles is happy is because of Derek freaking Hale.

Whatever though, Scott’s cool with this.

He’s just going to find some other way to get the upper hand over Derek. Hand…hand…oh gross, now he’s thinking about Derek and Stiles and sex because that was totally what was going on before he called.

Scott groans mentally even as he verbally plows on with lyrical descriptions of Allison’s hair and skin and the way she smiled when he did something nice for her.

_Well_ , he thinks as he sees Stiles and Derek making faces at each other, _at least some things make sense now._

**Author's Note:**

> NOTHING.


End file.
